TowerWeb Productions
The Alternative Library

The Katherine Siebenaler Interview

Author of "Sarah Smokes Marlboros"

Fortunately for us, JJ and I had the opportunity to meet online with Katherine Siebenaler for a contributing author interview. Kate is the author of the short story "Sarah Smokes Marlboros" that appeared in the Summer 2004 issue of the Midnight Times. We talked about everything from the interesting sub-themes of the story, to Kate's attending law school, to her views on shooting porno. We covered topics both serious and halarious, and even managed to gain some great insight into the story's main character, Sarah, as well as the author herself, who provided an eye opening glimpse on being a graduate of Catholic girls school. Thanks for the fantasic interview, Kate! I'm sure everyone will love it! Enjoy! -- Jay Manning, MT Editor

Below, Kate provided a post interview comment regarding the theme of "Sarah Smokes Marlboros." The actual inteview follows.

THE INTERVIEW

JJ Collins: I'm here.

Jay Manning: I'm here.

Katherine Siebenaler (Kate): You know what is so good about these email conferences? I'm eating lunch and making a huge mess, and you don't even know. (Except that I just told you.)

Jay: HA!

JJ: LOL!

Kate: Should we compare what everyone is wearing?

Jay: Okay -- I think we are all here and ready to go?

Kate: I'm ready. I have a question before we begin that I should have asked before. What parental guidance rating does this interview need to receive?

JJ: NC 17. LOL!

Jay: R -- say whatever you want.

JJ: I mean it's for people who read content on the Midnight Times web site. And the site is geared toward adults. Not that it requires anything raw. But you don't have to censor yourself.

Kate: Got it.

Jay: I guess I'll start things off, and JJ, if you have any questions, just jump in. So, what are you having for lunch?

Kate: Roast beef. Yum.

Jay: That was just a test question

Kate: Did I pass?

JJ: I wanna taste.

Jay: Sounds good! I had eggs for breakfast.

Kate: Eggs make your coat shiny.

JJ: I had nothing. I'm still wiping the sleep out of my eyes.

Kate: I hear you were under the weather.

JJ: Ugh, yes. Went to the doctor, and I'm better now. Thank you.

Jay: Okay. For real. You can use as many words to answer the questions as you need.

Kate: I had food poisoning last week and puked chinese take out for 24 hours straight.

JJ: Oh geez!

Jay: That would suck!

JJ: Did you take anything?

Kate: There's always someone worse off, isn't there?

JJ: Yes!

Kate: I took chinese food. That was the problem.

JJ: LOL! Poor girl! Do you turn green just by smelling Chinese food now?

Kate: YES! Isn't it amazing how you lose a taste for food after throwing it up?

JJ: Ugh! Yes! Like tequila.

Kate: I could never lose the taste for tequila.

JJ: Have you ever been drunk on it?

Jay: Here is a real question:

Kate: Oh no!

Jay: Kate, we are wondering, do you smoke Marlboros?

Kate: Did I mention that I didn't prepare for this interview?

JJ: LOL!

Jay: Neither did we!

JJ: Whatever. I have my dossier on Kate right here.

Jay: So about the question...

JJ: Now, about those Marlboros?

Kate: No. I don't smoke anymore. But I still have two very prominent cigarette burns on my uniform skirt that I wore like a badge of honor.

Jay: Nice!

Kate: (Pathetic teenage angst.) Adult angst is so much more sophisticated. No more need for cigarette burns on clothing.

Jay: Glad to hear you quit. I've quit twice. Last time was about 5 years ago.

Kate: Still holding steady?

Jay: Oh yeah. I'm one of those "reformed smokers."

Kate: That's good. It's a terrible habit. Dying early doesn't scare me as much as the pain (physical and psychological) of cancer and emphysema. Getting hit by a bus would be easier.

Jay: Speaking of teenage angst: in regard to Catholic girls school, loved it or hated it?

Kate: Oh, well... It's a complicated thing, isn't it? At the time (and still at moments today) I regard the experience as horrific child abuse. Certainly it impacted my outlook on life today... There were some people there who had nothing but the best of intentions... And others who I really believe were sadists.

Jay: Sounds tough.

Kate: It definitely taught me to stick up for myself. I almost didn't graduate.

Jay: Were you an angel or a devil?

Kate: (laughing) I was beelzebub himself. I definitely gave the nuns a run for their money.

JJ: Care to offer any examples?

Jay: I'm with JJ on that! What's the worst thing you did?

Kate: Well, once I was given an after-school suspension for suggesting that the nuns wanted us to simulate cunnilingus when they had us kneel in front of them to check the length of our uniform skirts. The worst thing? Let me think... I don't know what the worst was. Really, I still believe I was justified in ALL of it. I wrote a paper for Morality Class about how one teacher in particular should be investigated for driving several former students to suicide. She was always talking about students who had become good friends and later killed themselves. The principal didn't find it amusing. For career day I told a nun I wanted to perform abortions. I wrote my final Religion term paper (the one required for graduation) on a napkin in the car on the way to school and handed it to the teacher with a big shit-eating-grin on my face. The school counselor told my mother I was disturbed.

Jay: That's a great answer!

Kate: I could go on and on. I served a lot of detentions.

Jay: LOL! So did I!

Kate: Just let me know how many stories you want!! I set a different school on fire once with a tiki torch, but it wasn't a catholic school.

JJ: I am cracking up.

Jay: It sounds like you were drawing on a lot of personal experience for your story.

Kate: Yes and no.

Kate: I think I wasn't nearly so naive as Sarah.

Jay: At least in terms of the environment, I mean.

Kate: Actually, the school in the story sounds a lot nicer than the one I went to. But, yes, in terms of the religious doctrine that's forced onto students.

Jay: So what year did you did graduate? Have you or are you doing any college?

Kate: I graduated in 1996. Went to college. Graduated with a BA in Sociology & Psychology. Got a full ride scholarship to law school. Went for a year. Hated it. Dropped out. Law school was a lot like catholic school.

Jay: I can imagine -- too many rules.

JJ: In what ways were they similar for you, Kate?

Kate: Lots of out-dated tradition and unuseful rules that no one even bothered to try to make excuses for. The socratic process has been used for...forever in teaching the law. It's been shown time and time again that it is not the most effective teaching tool, and yet, it's tradition. I was in trouble from the start anyway, because of some legal problems I had encountered earlier. They're real sticklers about that stuff.

Jay: I would imagine. Okay, this kind of changes the subject, but at what point did you get interested in writing fiction?

Kate: I've been writing for as long as I can remember... I was reading by the age of 3 and even writing in a really simplistic way... My parents would write words on notecards, and I would make sentences across the living room floor. They called them "word trains"... That's what happens when you grow up with two teachers for parents... But I really appreciate having had that encouragement. It taught me to love literature down the line.

Jay: You had two teachers for parents and they sent you to Catholic girls school?

Kate: Well, it was my mother's alma mater, and I got a scholarship to go, so it was like, why not?

Jay: That makes sense. So partly, you have yourself to blame!

Kate: I wish I had been shooting porno back then. Those schools are like every man's (any many women's) fantasy.

Jay: JJ and I detected some of that in the story.

Kate: All these young girls, competing to roll the waistband of their skirts the highest, being very affectionate in the hallways...

Jay: Yeah. You definitely captured that theme.

Kate: My senior year the administration enacted the very first PDA prohibition because of all the lesbian action going on. Ironically, the dean was a lesbian. Oops, don't tell!

JJ: I am rolling on the floor.

Kate: Oh, but we were talking about writing! Oh, yes, back to me. How about this...in grade school, a friend and I used to write alternative endings to Christopher Pike books.

Jay: Okay, so the Sarah character is totally rebelling against that "wholesome" image because it is so fake. Right?

Kate: Oh, we're still on that subject?

Jay: We are still on the subject of you and writing.

Kate: Well, Sarah probably thinks that as she's "living" the story...but in my experience, the kind of (thinking of the word) ... hypocracy that comes across in the story, is everywhere. In Catholic schools it might come across more blatantly because those people are actually claiming to stand for some ideals, instead of openly standing for nothing at all. Did that make sense?

Jay: Yes. That's why we liked your story so much.

Kate: HA! You like the girls!

Jay: It wasn't just about a girl and some apparition.

Kate: You wished they had gotten it on!

Jay: I didn't get to go to Catholic girls school, so it was like getting an insider view!

JJ: LOLOL!

Kate: I've written a lot about the subject (Catholic school) becuase it was huge influence on my life.

JJ: Thanks for clarifing that!

Kate: I have another story about a retreat that I had to go on to this convent at a shrine where miracles have supposedly occurred. People have been healed in real life at that retreat. We were woken up at like 1:00 AM... told not to get dressed... were given a small handfull of rocks to put in our shoes... and then had to walk around like this in single-file (i forget how many times) to remind us of the kind of discomfort that jesus went through for us. That's the kind of sadism i'm talking about.

Jay: Sounds awful.

Kate: Some people really got into it though.

Jay: Ugh!

Kate: I wasn't sober, so it was all good by me.

Jay: Nice! You didn't mention any other publication credits in your cover letter. Is this your first short story publication or do you have some previous ones that you just didn't mention?

Kate: I've been published before in some local and regional zines, but I just started actively submitting work to publishers in March of this year. Before that it was like when friends or other people in the field would ask for my work, I would offer something... See, I made a lot of contacts in the field... I was twice invited to attend the Ohio Governor's "Institute for Gifted and Talented Writers." I don't know if they do it in every state. Probably not. But in Ohio they bring in a few big name authors to work with aspiring writers. They pick 50 people from the state, so it was a real honor to go twice. I worked with Martin Espada and Lee K. Abbott mostly. It was a lot of fun for us, although we took advantage of the program a lot... But you have to imagine, 50 really talented writers (everyone was much more talented than I) who were kind of counter-culture... A little unstable.

Jay: I find that hard to believe -- about everyone else being more talented, that is.

Kate: They threw us all together with no supervision in place that was next door to a graveyard.

Jay: A graveyard?

Kate: Yeah. We were at bowling green state university and there's a giant graveyard that borders the campus. Oh my god! We had a blast, and it was one of the most creative times of my life.

Jay: Is that when you wrote "Sarah Smokes Marlboros"?

Kate: No. I wrote that story in April of this year.

Jay: Was the ghost story aspect inspired by the graveyard?

Kate: Oh. I don't know. I've always liked ghost stories. I got married on halloween.

Jay: How long ago?

Kate: Last year.

Jay: Well congratulations!

Kate: Oh, thanks. But we've been together for 10 years now. It was a long time coming I guess.

Jay: Halloween is kind of an odd choice for a wedding day.

Kate: Halloween made perfect sense for us... Our first date was the Rocky Horror Picture Show... We both love horor movies, books, and the culture in general.

Jay: I can relate to that (about 10 years being a long time coming that is).

Kate: OK, explain. Need to get married?

Jay: Yes.

Kate: Ah...

Jay: My fiancée and I have been together for 8 years. But this isn't my interview...

Kate: Well, I don't regret putting it off at all. Don't be pressured into anything. Or are you doing the pressuring?

Jay: You were about to say something about the culture...

Kate: Are you trying to get off the subject of you?

Jay: We plan to get married next spring.

Kate: You should make that a feature on MT!

Jay: YEAH RIGHT!

Kate: "Webhead's Wedding."

Jay: HA! Just tell me about the culture thing and then we need to wrap up the interview so you can go on your trip. Where are you going, btw?

Kate: Going to spend the weekend with my brother in our hometown (Toledo, Ohio). It's his birthday. What was the culture thing? I don't remember.

Jay: Never mind. I realized I misunderstood one of your comments.

Kate: Are you scrambling for questions? Do you have enough material? I can babble forever if it would help.

Jay: Did you know that one of the stories in the last issue of MT, "Weddings...", by Jason Arbogast -- he is from Toledo, Ohio. But he insists Toledo is in Michigan -- that's in his bio. He's a school teacher, btw.

Kate: Yeah. I saw that. And someone from this issue (I think) is from Warren, MI, which is just outside of Detroit. You've got a real midwest thing going.

Jay: That is completely coincidental. But maybe the best writers are here in the midwest!

Kate: It's entirely possible.

Jay: I have to ask... are you a Red Wings fan?

Kate: (I'm terrified to know what the right answer to this question is.) I don't follow hockey. That is hockey, right?

Jay: Yes. Okay. That's fine. Last question -- unless you have anything else you want to add, or JJ wants to ask something. Any chance we could get a picture of you wearing your Catholic school girl skirt to go with the text of the interview?

Kate: You jackass! Should I be bending over?

Jay: No! It would need to be PG rated. You did say in your bio that you keep the skirt around for "special occasions" -- wouldn't this qualify?

Kate: Hmmm. I hadn't expected this request...

JJ: LOL. JJ falls to the floor with a crash, clutching his sides.

Kate: Maybe I should approve the interview before I submit the picture!!!

JJ: ...only sounds fair...

Jay: I'll send you a proof of the interview prior to publication. I probably would have done that anyway.

Kate: I do have something else to add, lest anyone think I have been too hard on my former high school... I would like to mention that I received an invaluable education there and have no regrets about attending. I feel like I've been speaking like tarzan. Which one of you gets to be Jane?

Jay: That's JJ.

Kate: The other one is a monkey, you know.

Jay: That's fine.

JJ: LOL!

Kate: I'm the completely hairless tarzan.

JJ: *cough* *cough*

Kate: Well, how the hell did that man have no hair on his body?

Jay: He shaved it, I'm sure.

Kate: His legs?

Jay: Probably. So about the picture?

Kate: I probably won't send the picture. It would undermine the seriousness of the work itself.

Jay: Oh please! That's BS. Well, think about it.

Kate: I will think about it.

Jay: I'll send you the interview text in a week or so after I've had a chance to edit it.

Kate: Sounds good. If you need anymore info, just let me know. Did I mention I went to high school with Katie Holmes?

JJ: hahahahhahaha. You did not!

Kate: It's true.

Jay: Wow! I love Katie Holmes.

Kate: She was a couple years younger than me, but I knew her.

JJ: Bettie Boop herself?

Kate: This was before the breast implants, of course.

JJ: LOL! So she was just a huge head at the time. Interesting.... hehe.

Jay: Well, Kate, thanks a gazillion for doing our first author interview!

JJ: Yes, most definitely.

Jay: I might have some questions when I go to edit, and I'll let you know if I need anything clarified.

Kate: It was my pleasure!

Jay: I wish we had more time to hear more of your school stories. Well, you have a safe trip!

Kate: I never get tired of telling them, so let me know. I sometimes think that I should make an anthology of catholic school girl stories.

JJ: That's not a bad idea.

Jay: That would probably be a best seller!

Kate: One of these days... Have a great weekend, both of you.

JJ: Thanks! You too Kate. We really appreciate it.

Jay: Thanks! You too!

JJ: Thanks for your time.

Kate: Talk to you soon.

Jay: Well, I guess that wraps it up...